It is reasonable to assume that many people rarely experience belonging in ways that make them feel and believe that they really do belong. Most of us are held in an all-pervading form of comfort which runs through our lives, seeming to sustain and support our general acceptance of ourselves and others in the world at large. While this maintains a baseline of confidence in our worth and in our right to claim our share of whatever the world has to offer, it also provides a contradictory means of dissolving that acceptance into an unnoticed and unrealized lack of awareness. This is where we are; we are used to being here; everything here is familiar to us; this is where we belong. We think no further than this. For as long as there is nothing to jolt us out of our comfortable numbness, we fail to even register that we have no sense of belonging. This pseudo-sense of home and of collective safety is born of our worldly existence as social beings; we live and we function in groups, as do many other creatures; as do sheep.
This is why the question rarely arises in our minds; without something to trigger an awakening, we do not even understand what belonging is: we have no way of knowing what it means and how it feels to belong. We really are sheep, and we will not be able to appreciate the food available to us until we have been rounded up from the hillsides and gathered into the safety of the fold.
How can any of us truly belong if we do not feel it? Basing our assessment of truth in our own lives solely on feelings is usually regarded as a distinctly unreliable means of progressing, but, more than anything else, belonging is a feeling, and it is generated through the deepening of our relationships with each other. More than this, it is a powerful antidote for those powers quietly working to maintain our disinterest and our separation, not only from each other, but from any awareness of our relationship with God.
This is why the question rarely arises in our minds; without something to trigger an awakening, we do not even understand what belonging is: we have no way of knowing what it means and how it feels to belong. We really are sheep, and we will not be able to appreciate the food available to us until we have been rounded up from the hillsides and gathered into the safety of the fold.
How can any of us truly belong if we do not feel it? Basing our assessment of truth in our own lives solely on feelings is usually regarded as a distinctly unreliable means of progressing, but, more than anything else, belonging is a feeling, and it is generated through the deepening of our relationships with each other. More than this, it is a powerful antidote for those powers quietly working to maintain our disinterest and our separation, not only from each other, but from any awareness of our relationship with God.
‘The Christians describe (God) as one “without whom Nothing is strong”. And Nothing is very strong: strong enough to steal away a man’s best years not in sweet sins but in a dreary flickering of the mind over it knows not what and knows not why, in the gratification of curiosities so feeble that the man is only half aware of them, in drumming of fingers and kicking of heels, in whistling tunes that he does not like, or in the long, dim labyrinth of reveries that have not even lust or ambition to give them a relish, but which, once chance association has started them, the creature is too weak and fuddled to shake off.’ (C. S. Lewis. The Screwtape Letters.)
In almost every occupation, interest, social group or activity, we can be regarded as belonging in a variety of ways and at different levels, both by ourselves and by others. Some of these have real meaning, while others are accepted as being mere tokens allowing easy access to superficial memberships of what is already open to all. We have our club-cards with which to gain points or other ‘benefits’ at the supermarket checkouts and from countless other stores and groups. Such examples do bring measurable benefits but not anything we can really believe to be worthwhile. What they successfully do, and what they are designed to do, is encourage us to return rather than take our custom and our ‘membership’ elsewhere.
I do not know of any churches which offer club-cards, though I have little doubt that they exist. It takes only a small shift in focus and in the intentions of those who organize such things, to change a genuine desire to develop effective outreach programmes and to help others, into an almost incestuous self-supporting system that offers discounts and other inducements, and access to such things as financial and legal services operated by members of the church. This gradually builds and strengthens an ‘in house’ attitude to a wide variety of things not directly connected with the work of the church; at least, not connected with what the church’s work should be.
It can quickly deteriorate further into a reflection of the business and marketing world in which it has grown, aiming for continual growth and regarding ‘membership’ numbers and their level of financial contribution as the most important measures of success.
It must be said that many such churches can and do also generate a real sense of belonging through their effective use of interpersonal skills, fellowship and following up after new contacts have been made, but, in some, the structure and the forces underlying the welcome and the wish to retain can stamp the entire enterprise with a marketing strategy label.
This is what belonging to a church can be: a lively experience and a sense of belonging similar to that which could be found in any other happy social gathering; but what makes for belonging in the Christian community sense is beyond all this. It can be missing from churches similar to the outline above just as it can be absent from those seeming to be unchangeable in their hushed and apparently irrelevant greyness. This does not only relate to particular churches of whatever denomination, but can be the sum total of our ‘belonging’ to The Church, to Christ’s Church complete with its guiding and enabling power of the Holy Spirit. This is being in touch with the Church without being touched by it. And being no more than in touch with it becomes a habit; we drift into a soporific void slowly losing all touch with God, His Word and His Church.
C. S. Lewis’s Devil continues, ‘... the only thing that matters is the extent to which you separate the man from (his God). It does not matter how small the sins are provided that their cumulative effect is to edge the man away from the Light and out into the Nothing. Murder is no better than cards if cards can do the trick. Indeed the safest road to Hell is the gradual one – the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts, ...’ (The Screwtape Letters.)
How can those of us who are within the Church attract, welcome, befriend and encourage those who may think to approach us from outside, when the only ones appearing to ask meaningful questions, who are journeying and seeking the answers, are those who hesitantly arrive at our door? It is essential that Christians be awakened from their sleep, and, with many of us unable or unwilling to rouse ourselves, those who are already awake must persistently strive to awaken others.
The words of Jesus to Peter when foretelling his denials of knowing Him, and his subsequent grief, repentance and return to strength, demonstrate both the recovery and growth to maturity required of us, and the fall from our own self-assurance that is frequently necessary before we are able to recognize the need for that fall and recovery in our arrival at real conviction.
“Look, Satan has got his wish to sift you all like wheat; but I have prayed for you, ... that your faith may not fail, and once you have recovered, you in your turn must strengthen your brothers.” (Luke 22:31,32)
In general terms, those who regard themselves as being part of the Church: those who are known and recognized as members of their own particular church congregations, parish communities and faith groups, have either arrived at a level of conviction –like Peter– that carries the responsibility to ‘strengthen’ their fellow members, or unknowingly make up the body of untouched Christians to whom I have been referring: those who need the support and encouragement of the ones who have already been enlivened by God’s touch. But the Church reaches beyond these apparently clear but non-existent boundaries to include real but seemingly invisible men and women. It includes everyone who entertains the thought that the Church may hold the answers, the safety, the acceptance and the spiritual home they seek. Every person presently out of touch with the Church, searching and possibly longing for contact and inclusion, and who sees enough in their limited external view of the Church to believe it may have the answers, is of immense importance to the life of the Church – and this has nothing to do with head counts. As individuals they have no less worth in the mind of God than any person with an established and visible place within the Church. Would that we could believe the same about our own views of membership and belonging.
If, as you read this, you recognize yourself as one who is outside the Church but aware of an inner calling to approach, however faint that call may be, be aware also, that your moving in from beyond the outer edge of Christian faith to the possibility of welcome and growth within it, is not only an answering of your own calling, but is necessary to the spiritual strength and wellbeing of those already within the Church. Your arrival, and your expression of a need to discover and to know, has the potential to awaken dormant hearts and minds; you can bring a badly needed jolt from an unexpected direction. We have need of you to walk with us every bit as much as you may need us during parts of your journey.
It must be said that many such churches can and do also generate a real sense of belonging through their effective use of interpersonal skills, fellowship and following up after new contacts have been made, but, in some, the structure and the forces underlying the welcome and the wish to retain can stamp the entire enterprise with a marketing strategy label.
This is what belonging to a church can be: a lively experience and a sense of belonging similar to that which could be found in any other happy social gathering; but what makes for belonging in the Christian community sense is beyond all this. It can be missing from churches similar to the outline above just as it can be absent from those seeming to be unchangeable in their hushed and apparently irrelevant greyness. This does not only relate to particular churches of whatever denomination, but can be the sum total of our ‘belonging’ to The Church, to Christ’s Church complete with its guiding and enabling power of the Holy Spirit. This is being in touch with the Church without being touched by it. And being no more than in touch with it becomes a habit; we drift into a soporific void slowly losing all touch with God, His Word and His Church.
C. S. Lewis’s Devil continues, ‘... the only thing that matters is the extent to which you separate the man from (his God). It does not matter how small the sins are provided that their cumulative effect is to edge the man away from the Light and out into the Nothing. Murder is no better than cards if cards can do the trick. Indeed the safest road to Hell is the gradual one – the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts, ...’ (The Screwtape Letters.)
How can those of us who are within the Church attract, welcome, befriend and encourage those who may think to approach us from outside, when the only ones appearing to ask meaningful questions, who are journeying and seeking the answers, are those who hesitantly arrive at our door? It is essential that Christians be awakened from their sleep, and, with many of us unable or unwilling to rouse ourselves, those who are already awake must persistently strive to awaken others.
The words of Jesus to Peter when foretelling his denials of knowing Him, and his subsequent grief, repentance and return to strength, demonstrate both the recovery and growth to maturity required of us, and the fall from our own self-assurance that is frequently necessary before we are able to recognize the need for that fall and recovery in our arrival at real conviction.
“Look, Satan has got his wish to sift you all like wheat; but I have prayed for you, ... that your faith may not fail, and once you have recovered, you in your turn must strengthen your brothers.” (Luke 22:31,32)
In general terms, those who regard themselves as being part of the Church: those who are known and recognized as members of their own particular church congregations, parish communities and faith groups, have either arrived at a level of conviction –like Peter– that carries the responsibility to ‘strengthen’ their fellow members, or unknowingly make up the body of untouched Christians to whom I have been referring: those who need the support and encouragement of the ones who have already been enlivened by God’s touch. But the Church reaches beyond these apparently clear but non-existent boundaries to include real but seemingly invisible men and women. It includes everyone who entertains the thought that the Church may hold the answers, the safety, the acceptance and the spiritual home they seek. Every person presently out of touch with the Church, searching and possibly longing for contact and inclusion, and who sees enough in their limited external view of the Church to believe it may have the answers, is of immense importance to the life of the Church – and this has nothing to do with head counts. As individuals they have no less worth in the mind of God than any person with an established and visible place within the Church. Would that we could believe the same about our own views of membership and belonging.
If, as you read this, you recognize yourself as one who is outside the Church but aware of an inner calling to approach, however faint that call may be, be aware also, that your moving in from beyond the outer edge of Christian faith to the possibility of welcome and growth within it, is not only an answering of your own calling, but is necessary to the spiritual strength and wellbeing of those already within the Church. Your arrival, and your expression of a need to discover and to know, has the potential to awaken dormant hearts and minds; you can bring a badly needed jolt from an unexpected direction. We have need of you to walk with us every bit as much as you may need us during parts of your journey.
The world saw nothing remarkable or worthy about the people Jesus called to be His Apostles, but He knew them: He knew the men they had been born to become. He had need of them; He called, and they followed.
Becoming aware of being called or touched makes us members of the wider Church, belonging to a large but mostly unseen group of companions, Christ’s followers, sharing in the journey and having the potential to support one another. (January 2007 posts: ‘Companionship for the journey.’) Even hanging back as a half-hidden follower of His followers, rather than of Jesus Himself, finds us all on the same hillside; in following these other people we are already following our Lord before consciously acknowledging recognition of Him. All that is needed to gain access to the food, the shelter and the safety we all need, and that He alone has made available to us, is to respond fully to the call; to come right into the fold with His closer followers: to step into the light and take our place within His Church.
Becoming aware of being called or touched makes us members of the wider Church, belonging to a large but mostly unseen group of companions, Christ’s followers, sharing in the journey and having the potential to support one another. (January 2007 posts: ‘Companionship for the journey.’) Even hanging back as a half-hidden follower of His followers, rather than of Jesus Himself, finds us all on the same hillside; in following these other people we are already following our Lord before consciously acknowledging recognition of Him. All that is needed to gain access to the food, the shelter and the safety we all need, and that He alone has made available to us, is to respond fully to the call; to come right into the fold with His closer followers: to step into the light and take our place within His Church.
‘And at once they left their nets and followed him.’ (Matthew 4:20)
